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I have been thinking about the phrase “a culture of love.” In education, we talk often about culture. We talk about belonging, psychological safety, relationships, trust, collaboration, and community. We seem far less comfortable using the word love in professional spaces. We should be using it more. I know a culture of love is possible because I am watching and listening to a school community describe itself this way. Not as an aspiration. Not as a slogan printed on a wall.

Some phrases get tossed around casually among friends, in private conversations, or in moments of frustration. Calling a colleague a “pain in the ass” during a professional meeting is not one of them. The problem is not simply that the phrase is crude. The problem is what the phrase communicates. It tells the room that asking questions can make you a problem. It suggests that challenging a process can make you difficult. It turns professional inquiry into a personality flaw.

Civility Is Not an Outdated Expectation “Use no Reproachfull Language against any one neither Curse nor Revile.” ~George Washington, Rules of Civility, Rule 49 More than 275 years ago, George Washington copied a collection of rules about civility, respect, and how people should conduct themselves in the company of others. Rule 49 offers a remarkably relevant reminder for today's workplaces, organizations, and professional communities. Words matter. There is a difference betwe

There are moments in leadership when "just do it" is exactly the right advice. Stop overthinking. Make the call. Take the first step. Move the work forward. There are also moments when "just do it" becomes something entirely different. It becomes an order. Push the initiative through. Get people on board. Make the change happen. Do not spend too much time worrying about resistance. Do not slow down for questions. Do not wait for collective understanding. Just get it done. Tha

Something is compelling about the fact that the magnetic compass came before the modern mechanical clock. Before we became exceptionally good at measuring how long something took, we had already developed a tool to help us figure out where we were going. I think there is a lesson in that. We spend an enormous amount of time measuring time. How long did the lesson take? How quickly did the student finish? Are we on pace? How many minutes are left? When will the initiative be i

“Real change, enduring change, happens one step at a time.” ~ Ruth Bader Ginsburg We tend to celebrate change once it is visible. The new program. The new habit. The new direction. The breakthrough everyone can finally see. What we do not always notice are the hundreds of smaller decisions that came before it. The conversation that shifted someone's thinking. The question that challenged an assumption. The decision to try something differently, even when no one else noticed.

One of the most beautiful things about fall is that the trees do not all change at once. They do not all turn the same color. They do not even respond to the season in exactly the same way. As daylight shortens and temperatures cool, chlorophyll begins to break down. The green fades, revealing pigments that were there all along, while other pigments develop in response to sugars, light, weather, and the biology of the tree itself. That is why one tree turns gold. Another turn

“Recognition is a reward in itself. Any form of appreciation, even a small word, is important.” ~ Vikrant Massey We spend a lot of time talking about feedback as a tool for growth. We talk about what needs to improve, what could be stronger, what should come next. Recognition deserves the same attention. A quick “I noticed.” A sincere “Thank you.” A simple “You handled that well.” A moment of saying, “What you did mattered.” Those words can seem small to the person offering t

Apparently, I can find a leadership lesson anywhere. This time, it happened in a World War I trench. I have been listening to Angel Down as part of my somewhat ambitious journey to read every winner of the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction, including the years when it was still called the Pulitzer Prize for the Novel. If you are equally intrigued by slightly unreasonable literary goals, join me. I could use the company. Somewhere in the listening, one phrase lodged itself in my brai

There is a phrase that captures one of the hardest parts of caring deeply about this work: The curse of giving a $h1t. Crude? Yes. Accurate? Also yes. Especially in education. There are a lot of teachers trying very hard to create healthier boundaries. They are trying to stop checking email at night. They are trying not to answer every message immediately. They are trying to leave work at work, protect weekends, reclaim dinner, go to the gym, sit with their families, watch a

As a child, I rarely took things at face value. I asked questions. I looked for the exception. I tried to examine an idea from several sides before accepting it. My sentences often began with some version of, “What about this?” or “What if that happened?” or “Okay, but then what happens when...?” The response was not always enthusiastic. I was told more than once that I would be “great on the debate team.” Other times, the question was more pointed: Why did I always have to b

“There are years that ask questions and years that answer.” ~ Zora Neale Hurston At the start of a new school year, we tend to think about what the year will bring. What if the more important question is what kind of year we will help create? Will this be a year that asks students to stretch, wonder, struggle productively, and discover what they are capable of? Will it be a year that gives them answers, not simply in the form of content, but in the form of confidence, belongi

“Strong women stand up for themselves, and stronger women stand up for others.” ~Leslie Higgins, Ted Lasso (Season 4, Episode 2) Strength is not only measured by how firmly we advocate for ourselves. It is also revealed in how willingly we use our voices, influence, experience, and access to support someone else. Standing up for others can look like speaking their name in a room they have not yet entered, opening a door that once felt closed, challenging an unfair assumption,

What Are You Contributing? We often think of contribution as something big. Leading an initiative. Solving a difficult problem. Creating something new. Receiving recognition for work that made a visible difference. Contribution is not always loud, formal, or easy to measure. Sometimes it is asking the question no one else has considered. Sometimes it is sharing an idea, offering encouragement, or helping a colleague see another possibility. It may be creating space for someon

In this video (https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1K9qf3DAXu/?mibextid=wwXIfr), a successful musician tells the story of deciding to leave New York and move to Nashville to pursue music. His guidance counselor thought he was making a huge mistake. They cared about him, wanted him to be successful, and was giving him advice based on what she understood about stability, careers, and the world. For a moment, he almost believed them. Of course, we know the story differently because

My parents were watching a video of my daughter’s competition when they noticed something happening far in the background. Across the gymnasium, well behind my daughter, someone threw her arms up and cheered when my daughter’s name was announced. The moment was small enough that I had not noticed it at first, but my parents did. They wanted to know who she was because her joy was unmistakable. It was my friend. She and her athlete live in another state. They compete for anoth

Thoughtful Thursday “It is nice to have valid competition; it pushes you to do better.” ~ Gianni Versace Competition has the power to bring out the best in us, but only when we allow it to inspire rather than intimidate us. Valid competition is not about hoping someone else fails so that we can succeed. It is about recognizing excellence, respecting the work behind it, and allowing it to challenge us to raise our own standards. The strongest competitors are often the ones who

The Last Four Minutes We all have routines. Some are obvious, while others quietly become part of who we are without us even realizing it. For years, mine was simple. During the last four minutes of my drive to work each morning, I would make sure Have It All by Jason Mraz was playing. It became much more than a song. It became my transition. Those final moments allowed me to leave behind whatever I was carrying from home, mentally prepare for the day ahead, and remind myself

After the Fireworks There is something magical about fireworks. The anticipation, the color, the noise, the way everyone stops for a few minutes and looks up together. For a little while, the sky becomes the center of our attention. After the fireworks, there is a different kind of beauty. There is a quiet walk back to the car. The sleepy children wrapped in blankets. The folding chairs being packed away. The smell of summer grass. The soft conversation after the big celebrat

“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.” ~Nelson Mandela Mandela’s words remind us that freedom is not only something we claim for ourselves. True freedom asks us to consider how our choices, words, leadership, and actions affect the people around us. It is easy to celebrate freedom with fireworks, flags, and family traditions. It is harder and more meaningful to ask whether we are creating