Emotional Reactivity
- Catherine Addor
- Jan 2
- 2 min read
Teaching is emotional work.
Classrooms are full of developing humans, high stakes, time pressure, and deeply personal values. Add parent communication, staff dynamics, and the constant hum of accountability, and it’s no surprise that emotions sometimes rise faster than reason.
Emotional reactivity isn’t a character flaw; it’s a nervous-system response. The challenge isn’t to eliminate emotion, but to manage our reactions so they don’t manage us, especially in moments that require clarity, professionalism, and trust.
When we react instead of respond, we risk saying things we didn’t mean, escalating situations unnecessarily, or carrying stress long after the moment has passed. When we slow down, regulate, and choose our response, we model the very skills we want students to learn.
This matters everywhere:
In classrooms when a student challenges us
With families when emotions are high
In staff meetings when tensions surface
In emails, texts, and hallway conversations
Managing emotional reactivity involves creating a pause between the trigger and the response. That pause is where wisdom lives.
Questions to Ask Yourself: (These questions are meant to build awareness before emotions take the wheel.)
What am I feeling right now, and what might be underneath that feeling?
Is this situation urgent, or does it simply feel urgent?
What outcome do I want from this interaction?
How will my response impact trust, not just compliance?
Would I be proud of this response if it were replayed later?
Actionable Steps: (Small, practical moves that protect your energy and your professionalism.)
Build a pause habit. Take one full breath before responding, especially in emails or meetings.
Name, don’t judge. Quietly label the emotion (“I’m frustrated”) to reduce its intensity.
Delay when needed. “Let me think about that and get back to you” is a powerful professional tool.
Set boundaries around access. Not every message needs an immediate reply.
Regulate before you communicate. A calm body leads to a clearer message.
Debrief, don’t dwell. Reflect after challenging moments, then release them.
Model regulation out loud. Let students see what it looks like to pause and reset.
Managing emotional reactivity doesn’t mean being passive or silent. It means choosing responses that align with your values, protect relationships, and sustain you for the long haul.
The most effective educators aren’t emotionless; they’re emotionally skilled.
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